


Collection

by KhadaVengean



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Akira accepts the deal, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Angst, Anxiety, Bad Ending, Child Abandonment, Child Neglect, Children, F/M, Female Kurusu Akira, Guilt, Hallucinations, Harm to Children, Heavy Angst, Oh Jung, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Persona 5 Vanilla Bad Ending, Pregnancy Scares, Psychological Drama, Psychological Horror, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Repression, Shadows - Freeform, fear of being abandoned, where you at
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-14 09:56:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29540625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KhadaVengean/pseuds/KhadaVengean
Summary: "You’ve made a deal. You carried through it. And you gained everything you’ve ever wanted. But you are the one who can destroy it. So easily. Don’t betray me."Akira Akechi gained everything. A husband, two daughters, a life she'd call perfect.But only a small crack brings the facade to fall.Sequel toDeal
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Kurusu Akira & Phantom Thieves of Hearts
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	1. I: Exposition (Snow in Summer)

**Author's Note:**

> First: READ THE TAGS PLEAAAAAAASE! This will probably the darkest thing I ever write and I intend to make it very dark. With so many topics to explore and talk about. This is going to be such a fun ride. 
> 
> I FINALLY DID IT! After roughly one and a half year of publishing my fic [Deal](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19629817) on AO3, I finally managed to begin the sequel. I've thought about this for very long and very detailed and I can say one thing: this whole thing (including the way I'm intenting to go and hoping I can pull it off alright) is inspired by both games named [Nier](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nier_\(video_game\)) and [Nier: Automata](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nier:_Automata). If you do not know them, I highly recommend to check them out, especially for the Sountrack. If you DO know them...
> 
> you know what that means. :)
> 
> I can tell you that I am working heavily on this thing and I intend to be as quick as possible. The first chapter is very confusing, but I'm hoping you will bear with me for this moment. I have the second one already done and will prolly upload it this weekend. 
> 
> Another warning: This will include some really heavy stuff. Like, jeez louise, please spare me the pain. 
> 
> This fic has also been inspired by (who is surprised) [JadeDraggy2017](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadeDraggy2017). If you read this, thank you again. ^^ 
> 
> If you have ANY kind of opinion on this fic, it will be appreciated. Thank you already for advance. And to those who liked the first part: I hope you will enjoy this conclusion. 
> 
> Let's get into it, shall we? 
> 
> English is not my first language. Please be aware of that!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Herr, die Not ist groß!  
> Die ich rief, die Geister  
> werd ich nun nicht los."
> 
> Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Zauberlehrling (1797)
> 
> [Snow in Summer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6kXb0NL1PE)

_Let us sing, let us dance. Let us forget our worries a_ _nd all our pain. There is nothing to stop us from feeling joy and happiness. There is no one forcing us to feel sadness and grief. Sorrow no longer exists._

_You’ve made a deal. You carried through it. And you gained everything you’ve ever wanted. You married a knight of light, became the princess of this world with its generous god and you gave birth to the heirs of the sky. They carry the sun and moon within themselves and they will never betray you. They will never leave you._

_Your light will always stay loyal. He will always love you. You two are inseparable. There is nothing to cut you in two. There is nothing to stop you. You will keep your happy life. A mortal, equal to a goddess. You have created a path for the creation of this world._

_But you are the one who can destroy it. So easily. Don’t betray me._

_DON’t LeAve mE._

_Don’t SHUT ME Out._

_BE beAUTifUl._

_Be STrOnG ._

_TAKe his AFFection._

_Gain HIS LOVE._

_NEVER LOSE THE thing THAT MADE YOU WHO you ARE._

_YOU ARE my CREATION. I MADE YOU._

_YOU are a goddess among men._

_YOUR wish made this REALITY happen._

_BE beAUTifUl._

_Be STrOnG ._

_BE crUEL._

_KILl them._

* * *

_**"Let's make a deal… Ok? You won't say no...will you?"** _


	2. Chapter 2: Aufsteigende Handlung (Possessed by a Disease)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Nun stehst du starr,  
> Schaust rückwärts, ach! wie lange schon!  
> Was bist du, Narr,  
> Vor winters in die Welt entflohn?"
> 
> Friedrich Nietzsche, Vereinsamt (1884)
> 
> [Possessed by a Disease](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEP1bKv7-r0)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I need to work tomorrow and on Sunday, I'm uploading it now. To really understand this one, you have to read [Deal](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19629817). 
> 
> This chapter deals with esoteric, fortune tellers, anxiety issues, fear of being left alone, child neglect, (kinda) child abuse. Warning for all these things.
> 
> All information about the Tarot Cards have been taken from the Shin Megami Tensei Wikia. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy! Any kind of word is appreciated and will be taken to heart, independent from postivie or negative critic.

Even though Mai was brave enough to eat all of her veggies yesterday, the weather didn’t look too promising. Dark storm clouds were gathering on the horizon, threatening the sunny day that was predicted on the weather forecast.

It was still October so she shouldn’t be surprised. But still, Akira knew that her daughter won’t be too pleased about it. It was her fourth birthday and the only wish she possessed was to go to the amusement park with her sister and parents.

Akira let out a sigh, drew the curtain back to its original place and returned to the kitchen. She caught her husband standing over the newspaper, his brown hair bound to her beloved ponytail and skimming through the papers with a frown on his handsome face. Even though he was already thirty four, he still possessed the same youthfulness back in their days when they were just eighteen and seventeen.

Something **cold** hit her brain. But it was so fleeting that Akira only needed to blink and it was **gone**.

“Everything alright?” She watched how his eyes analyzed the words the reporters wrote. The photo of a car accident and the headline saying something about a hit and run forced a shiver down her spine.

“The number of casualties are rising. The number of crimes being committed has skyrocketed since three weeks ago and we have absolutely no clue on who the culprit is. We have already thought of them being an organization, but there is no proof to get on their identities.” Goro sighs and now she sees how the lines of his age were carved into his skin. She guessed that despite his youthfulness, he was also a victim of time.

“Please be careful.” The thought was flickering, only crossing her mind for only a second, but it was there. “I know it’s your job and it’s something you love, but don’t be too reckless.”

He turned to look at her. Her husband’s eyes were looking at her in the tenderness he always possessed in their most important moments – the day they decided to enter a relationship together, both their graduations, the moment they found the house in which she gave birth to both their daughters and raised them with a loving hand. On the day he proposed to her, their wedding day.

“There is no need to worry about me, Akira.” He placed his hand on her shoulders and kissed her forehead. Wrapping his arms around her midsection, with her hands on his chest, only an inch separated their faces. “Ever since we’re together, there was no casualty. You are my guardian angel. As long as we stay together, there is nothing that could possibly happen to me.”

He kissed her. And oh, how it was still such a great feeling even after seventeen years of companionship. His lips against hers, the lush feelings that set her heart aflame and let her blush like a teenage girl back in her youth. Her soul was blooming, radiant and beautiful and she let out a small gasp when not even a paper fit between them.

_You two are inseparable._

Suddenly, her hunger grew. Nearly devoured her. Instead of letting go, she sneaked her arms behind his neck and linked them, pulling him down to her height. His own hands wandered from her waist down to her hips, descended to her bottom and she already felt his hands on her thighs, ready to host her up and press her against the closest wall-

_TAKe his AFFection._

But sudden steps let them drive apart, a gasp out of her own mouth and a chuckle from her husband, who pressed his face against her neck and his hands were around her waist once more. She panted, tried to take deep breaths and looked around in confusion, until a voice shook the house in its entire core.

“Mommy!”

The star of the day, the birthday girl, trampled down the stairs in her usual bright attitude and manner and barged into the dining room without a second thought,  her black curls bouncing with every step and her big red eyes opened far and wide. “ Can we go? Please?”

“Hold your horses, your sister isn’t even here yet.” She switched her eyes between her husband and her daughter, stood on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss against her husband’s cheeks, catching the glitter in his eyes and released herself from his embrace.

_Gain HIS LOVE._

“Mommy!” Mai pouted with her adorable lips, a token inherited by her father, without a doubt and raised her arms. “I want a hug too.”

“Everything for our birthday girl, right?” Husband and wife quickly exchanged looks, looking how his lips were still kept in a smile. Father and daughter looked so similar to each other, the only thing distinguishing them was the color of her hair.

Akira put her arms under those of her daughters, lifted her slowly and carefully, like a bird spreading her wings and taking flight. She shone so bright, beamed at her parents and Akira pressed a kiss against her cheek. “Happy birthday, my little bird.”

_Heirs of the Sky._

Goro reacted immediately, wrapping an arm around her waist and pressing a kiss on his little carbon copy, nuzzling her skin and getting a squeal from their younger child. Delighted and childish glee filled the room like a wave and Akira let her shoulders lower.

She leaned her head against her husband’s shoulder, enjoyed the weight of her daughter in her arms and her husband’s presence by her side. It was wonderful, perfect.

To drop her daughter all of a sudden was a thought only in the farthest corner of her mind.

* * *

“Mom, let’s go! The park is going to open in thirty minutes.”

“Hurry!”

“I’m coming, you two.” With a thud, Akira closed the back of her car with a small hit and watched how Sayuri has already taken a seat in the back with her sister. Normally, Mai would sit behind her father and Sayuri behind her mother – Akira didn’t know why they kept that up, but she wasn’t one to complain.

She took a last look of everything – two bags for her daughters, filled with food and bottles of water so that they didn’t have to buy too much from the overly expensive stores in the park. Umbrellas in case it’d get wet, their tickets in her pocket and an extra jacket for her girls in case it’d get colder all of a sudden.

“You got everything?”

“I think so.” With a small huff, Akira leaned back, raised her eyebrow at her husband standing on the carport. “What, do you want to get rid of me?”

He simply smiled. Did he?

“ _You’re the one that’s going to disappear!”_

The light beginning of a headache spread in the back, its root taking hold of her brain. She suppressed a wince, though she noticed how Goro’s look suddenly turned-

_into anger, hatred, envy-_

\- worry and he tilted his head. “Everything alright?” With his hands on her shoulders, she let out a deep sigh, nodding slowly and carefully. His thumbs ran over her cheek, touching her cheekbones and she leaned into his tender gesture. “Should I get some medics for you?”

“It’s alright. I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

The questioning look on his face irritated her. Akira didn’t know why, but she nodded once more, slower this time. “I’m sure. For how long have we been together?”

“ _I’m a rookie detective.”_

“Do you really want to hear that number?”

She laughed. “It feels like yesterday.”

His gaze became wistful. Like there was something that was far away and his resignation won over his desire to change the outcome.

A pickle of ice was pushed through her heart. She was sure that her blood would freeze in an instant.

“It does.” Once again, she could feel his lips on her face, gently touching her forehead. “Have fun okay? And enjoy yourself, alright?”

“Okay okay, officer, I’ve heard you just right.” She shook her head, her black curls bouncing with her every step.

“Good.”

And he kissed her. One more time. Just like that.

And Akira suddenly felt young again. Like a teenage girl. Oh, the things she would do to him right in that moment-

“MOM!”

“Mommy!”

Until duty stroke once more and they drove apart. Akira let out a sigh, Goro laughed and pressed his lips against her temple in a silent invitation for more. “I’ll wait for you.”

“You better.”

They parted. While Akira went to the front seat, she listened how her daughters unbuckled their seat belts. “What, you don’t want to say goodbye to me?”

“Papa,” both girls cried out and reached through the open window to latch their arms around Goro’s neck, their father laughing openly. First Sayuri, then Mai, who climbed on her sister’s lap and her husband leaned down to give her access.

“ _I was always particular about my public image, my grades, my life, so someone would want me around!”_

Akira watched with a spicy note on her tongue.

“Okay, have fun you two. And don’t cause your mother too much trouble, okay?”

“Yes, Papa.”

Akira smiled, let down her car window and leaned her head over the edge. “Goro.” The way she spoke his name let a feel of fuzzy butterflies in her stomach return and let a sense of dread fill her chest. “Be careful, okay?”

Silver and red met. A blade  _ and blood. His blood on her dagger.  _

_Her blood on a white table._

_Let us forget our worries and all our pain._

His gaze was tender once more. Far from the way he once looked at her-

“ _Die!”_

“I will.” Another quick kiss on her mouth and both their daughters gurgled, bringing a chuckle to his wonderful voice that whispered the sweetest nothings in her ear and _called her names-_

“I’ll see you later.”

She touched his cheek, reverently, like the statue of a god.

_You married a knight of light, became the princess of this world with its generous god_

“See you later.”

* * *

To gain access into the amusement park, they had to wait fifteen minutes. While Mai was dancing on the spot, trying to stand on her tiptoes and mimic the ballerinas she has seen on TV, Sayuri was boasting how she knew that they had to leave early so they wouldn’t have to wait for too long.

Akira watched her daughters and as a trio, they entered the great park with a castle as the main focus in the middle.

And throughout the hours, she couldn’t complain one bit about it. It was Mai’s birthday and the first priority was to make her happy. And from the way she looked around with her big red eyes and her black curls bouncing with every skip she made, Akira knew that she was victorious.

After all, she wanted her daughters to celebrate their date of birth. She wanted to show the world that she was happy giving birth to her two girls.

They rode childproof roller coasters, carousels, ate cotton candy and gave them money to try out the crane machines. Sayuri easily became an absolute champ of gaining all kinds of plushies for her sister: a black panther, a white fox and a black cat.

Although Sayuri eyed the last one warily, trying to scratch away the blue buttons as its eyes, Akira wasn’t sure if she was supposed to be worried or not.

_She’s just a child, trying to find the boundaries in this world._

When the hours of the morning have passed, Akira felt her age weigh down on her shoulders. She knew she wasn’t the youngest anymore with her nearly thirty-five years and it was a feeling that resonated in her bones.

Akira took a seat on a bench, resting her back against the wood and watched her daughters run to a tent close to her, giving her the ability to keep an eye on them. Their curiosity was too strong to not check it out and she had relented when they showed their best puppy eyes. Another trait they have both gained from their father and something she simply couldn’t say no to.

Minutes passed and Akira started to observe the people. Families, young and old, with baby strollers and little children clinging to their parents’ hands. Or teenagers, who walked around with their school bags on their shoulders, eating crepes and laughing about a school event they just came from.

“My stomach is ready for roller coaster.”

Akira felt her eyebrow twitch. Massaged her temple and the back of her head, the headache spreading into the middle of her scalp. Like vines, they slowly crawl from the back to the front and she absolutely hated this feeling.

“Mommy.”

Akira opened her eyes and looked at her two daughters. They held hands and something in their other. “Are you okay, mommy?,” Sayuri asked, her gray eyes drenched in worry and care. Mai instead let go of her sister’s hand and climbed on the bench with Akira’s help, seating herself on her mother’s lap.,

“Look here, mommy!” Her youngest daughter pressed her new item of attention against her nose and startled a laugh out of her mouth. Akira gently took the wrists of her daughter, keeping them distant from her face. “A man gave this to us.”

And the sole sight of the card in her daughter’s hand froze her body. Her blood stopped to run through her veins, her heart stopped beating and she was sure that this was the punishment she would get from her actions.

But which actions? What did she do to deserve this feeling in her chest?

Akira Akechi didn’t know. She didn’t know why the sight of a card in her daughter’s hand, printed with a figure holding a trumpet in the middle and the number **XX** on the bottom was able to stop time in its entire existence. Why was she feeling misery all of a sudden?

“What-” She cleared her throat, lowered the wrists of her younger daughter and looked at her older one. “What is this? Where did you get that?”

She hoped it was a misunderstanding – but it was quickly denied when the girl with the long brown hair, a token from Goro, so beautiful and soft, just like her father, beamed at her and showed her _her_ _mother’s_ smile. “There is a fortune teller in this tent!,” she exclaimed happily, holding up her own card. “Look, he read the fortunes of me and Mai and gave them to us!” 

Hers was the sight of a scale. Both the picture and the background were held in two different colors: the background of the left was red while the other was gray, the scale painted in the respective other color. The number  **VIII** was printed on the bottom and Akira felt how bile climbed up her throat. She didn’t know, but she wanted to throw up on her own daughters. 

“I see.” She gulped it down. “Then do you know what those cards are?”

“Me first!,” Mai suddenly cried and pushed it into the hands of her older sister, who quietly accepted the birthday girl’s wish and showed it to her.

The trumpet on the card looked like a sense.

“The fortune teller said that Mai is _Judgment_. _”_

_**Satan.** _

“He said that Mai’s purpose in life is clear and her calling will never falter. She will never have problems to decide on something important in her life.”

Mai nodded eagerly, clearly overjoyed by the words of her sisters. How was she supposed to understand this with her tender age? What nonsense.

Akira had to bite her tongue. She tasted blood.

“I see. That’s good to hear.” She didn’t pet Mai’s hair when she leaned her head against her chest, right between her breast. _I thought the time when you had to_ _ **latch on my breasts to eat were over, foolish child-**_

“And what about you, Sayuri?” She eyed the card. “What did this fortune teller tell you?”

“I have _Justice!”_

_**Metatron.** _

“He told me that I have a high sense of rationality and analysis and justice!” She beamed so much that it hurt like looking directly at the sun. “He told me I will become a great detective!”

_Foolish. You want to get into such a dangerous territory when you don’t even have **enough guts or intelligence to survive even for a day-**_

“I’m happy for you, Sayuri. Those are great news.”

Her daughters didn’t seem to notice her discomfort. Her limbs were growing fatigue  and she felt like Mai’s weight chained her to the wooden bench. Her back hurt, her arms and legs becoming stiff. Where was Goro when she needed him? 

“I have an idea!” Sayuri clapped her hands all of a sudden, not minding that her card was affected by the sudden force. “Mommy, maybe the fortune teller will you give you a card too!”

In this case, Akira didn’t have the slightest chance of saying no. Without any hesitation, both her daughters grabbed her hands and dragged her across the plaza, skipping ahead and chattering between themselves. While Mai was the energetic one, Sayuri remained relatively calm. Every once in a while, the two girls looked at their mother with a certain gleam in their eyes.

Why was it so familiar to be dragged around by two young girls who looked so similar to each other?

Before she could utter another word, of gentle coaxing or screaming protest, Akira saw the tent. A small blue one with stars on the old and worn down fabric.

Malevolence was the only thing that was emitted from the black opening in front of her. She couldn’t see any light or source of electricity. The entry was black, dark like the night.

“Are you sure that… this fortune teller is still here?” Akira tried to find a silhouette, something that let her eyes adjust to the dark ambient, but nothing. Absolutely nothing. “Maybe he took a break?”

“Let’s check it out!”

The grip of Sayuri’s fingers was stronger than the one of Goro. While her husband was strong and also sometimes dragged her somewhere, although always playfully, the hand of her oldest daughter nearly crushed her fingers in her strength and Akira wanted to howl out in pain.

It was a death sentence. They dragged her to the scaffold, the **guillotine** already waiting to **chop** **off her head.**

“Welcome.”

Akira’s entire world stopped. Space and time weren’t relevant anymore. Forget the guillotine – this was far worse. At least it would give her a quick death.

But this was the direct opposite.

“What an honor to receive you two as my guests once more, young ladies.”

“Hello!,” Sayuri cried out and Akira felt her hand twitched. The idea to slap her daughter across the face was the first and certainly not the last one in this moment. “Our mommy wanted to know about her own card as well.”

“Oh?”

The voice finally reached her ears. Like, fully found a way into her ear carnal and touched the vines in her head, spreading through her brain. A simple word, a simple touch of his organ and they started to bloom in flowers of exorbitant pain.

Akira wished to wince. Her sense of longing for her husband was rarely that big. But in this moment, she didn’t want her daughters or herself – the only thing she wanted was Goro by her side, taking her hand and bringing her to a place where this wouldn’t be able to touch her.

_ Don’t SH u T  m E Out. _

“My. What a beautiful woman to stand in front of me.” The voice said and chuckled menacingly. “Welcome, young lady. Welcome to my fortune telling service.” 

Her mouth was sewed shut, no words escaped her. Until a tug on her left hand broke her out of her stupor and she didn’t need to look to the right to see the confused gate of Mai on her profile. “Hello.”

“You are interested in having your fortune read?”

She looked at gray and red, brown and black, her husband and herself and nodded slowly, a d ry chuckle escaping her throat. “Well, there wasn’t much of a choice here.”

“ _ **You already made the most important ones-”**_

Akira blinked.

“I see.” The man, obscured by a black hood, nodded. She couldn’t see his face, only a small lamp brightened the room with its flickering light. So easily to cut off, so easy to diminish it. “Be my guest. Take a seat.”

He gestured to a chair in front of his small table – a worn out thing, decades old and probably belonging into a n old attic of a house no one would ever want to visit. 

“ _You’re just some trash living in an attic!”_

Akira followed, despite every instinct in her screaming not to. She felt the headache slowly climbing to the front, nearly reaching her forehead and smashing her skulls to pieces. She took a seat in front of him and both her girls were flanking her sides.

“Well then, my lady.” The man in front of her spoke with a charming note. “Let’s begin. Do you want me to tell you the rules of this game?” A shiver ran down her spine. “Or maybe do the two princesses wish to explain this game to their mother?”

“I want!,” Mai cried out and Akira seriously needed to teach her to not just randomly cut in with her voice. Especially when her mother was having a headache.

Mai leaned forward over the table, pointed to the deck of cards that suddenly appeared out of nowhere. “You must take the cards and-”

“and shuffle,” Sayuri chimed in.

“- suffle them. When you suffled them, you take one.”

Akira raised her eyebrow. “That’s it?”

“That’s correct. There is nothing more.” He pushed the deck of cards to her. “Shall we begin?”

She remembered the weight of Sayuri in her arms when she picked up the cards. So small and fragile, but the urge to drop her on the cold floor of the hospital was immense.

Akira shuffled. Slowly, carefully, probably for a couple of minutes. Time seemed to flow differently in this tent, in this small world different from theirs.  The sensation of the cards in her hand changed – they stuck to her fingers like glue, then felt like the finest velvet on her skin or changed to something old  and metallic. 

Akira put the deck back on the table.  Everything was in  in  slow motion. 

Her life was on the line.

The back of the cards – a face, split apart in the middle in two different colors, blue and black – looked at her mockingly, angry and in grief. A snarl, a frown, a sob.

“Well then, _princess_ -”

_A mortal, equal to a goddess._

Akira blinked.

“Well then, my lady.” He gestured to the deck, his hands kept under the table. “Draw one.”

She looked at the deck, the pile of cards. Reached forward.

And pulled away the one on the top.

She turned it around and lay it openly for the world to see. For everyone who maybe wasn’t with her anymore.

A chuckle from the man in front of her and two surprised noises from her daughters.

“My. How fitting for a _goddess like you-”_

_YOU are a goddess among men._

“I wasn’t expecting to see such a card for someone like yourself, my lady. Although, if you look at your daughters-” 

Akira didn’t want to be in her own skin anymore.

“I shouldn’t be surprised.”

The horned figure, standing above two naked and chained figures, was the picture of sinister evil.

Akira wondered if this was even okay to show this to two girls who were still so young.

“This is the devil, my lady,” the man whispered, but it was so much louder than when he normally spoke. He tipped on the bottom of the card, **XV.** “Do you know what this entails?” Another chuckle, so much darker than before. “You follow your own instincts, your wishes and your impulses. You do the things that you deem right and you do not care about the opinion of others.”

“ _You truly are a child of man… it seems you couldn’t win against your own desires.”_

“ _You are a trickster after all...”_

The picture of a large fly crept into her mind. But its name was unknown to her.

“I think that is pretty accurate,” Akira said and looked at the two heads of hair. Black and brown. While Mai has snuggled into her side, putting her arm around her, Sayuri had her arms folded on the desk. She heard the man raise an eyebrow. “If I wouldn’t have done what I believed in, I wouldn’t be married and have two daughters. You can’t always follow everyone else’s desire, right?”

_Let us sing, let us dance. There is nothing to stop us from feeling joy and happiness. There is no one forcing us to feel sadness and grief. Sorrow no longer exists._

“What an interesting thing to say from someone so young.” The man put his hand on the deck in front of her. “But, a question of mine, if you do not mind.”

“ _Do you regret-”_

“ _Is there something you wish-”_

“You’ve mentioned a husband, my lady.”

_He will always love you._

“May I ask how long you’ve been together?”

Mai raised her head and put it on her lap, Sayuri leaned on the right side of the chair. A smile bloomed on Akira’s lips and the wedding ring on her finger sat snugly around her digit, warming her insides. “ Since our high school days.” 

“My, it truly must have been fate to bring you two together.”

There was an edge to his words. But Akira only blinked and she could have sworn he didn’t say anything about her answer, just hummed and let it be. She tilted her head, started to skim her fingers through Sayuri’s hair. From the scalp to the tips of her hair, she admired once more how soft it was.

Also a trait from her father.

“There is something I wish to ask you, or rather, something I can offer.” He gestured to the deck, put his hand on the card she has drawn and lifted it slowly. It was gone – like it was never there. She looked at him and for a second, Akira saw him smirking under his hood. “Are you curious to know which card fits your husband?”

Before any reasonable thought to decline could reach her mind, two excited voices shouted “Yes” through the entire tent. The vines in her head tightened their hold around her synapses, pulling softly at the edges and brought a ringing to her ears.

“Can we, mommy?”

“I want to know too.”

Akira inhaled deeply, exhaled shakily and looked the man in front of her into his hidden and obscured face. The only thing that she slowly started to recognize was the tip of his nose. “You can? Even though my husband is not here right now?”

This was such a very bad idea.  _ Turn around, leave this tent. Don’t think about the girls, just get the hell out of here-  _

“Of course, my lady. There is no need to be suspicious or concerned.”

_DON’t LeAve mE._

“ Then what do I need to do?” She removed her hand from her daughter’s hair, earning a sound of frustration from her oldest. She didn’t even notice her finger’s trembling. 

Mai played with the fingers of her other hand. Akira didn’t want her to.

That was the only thing that crossed her mind.

“Do you maybe have a picture of him with you? His face and your thoughts about him will be enough for me to detect his card,” he explained and gestured once more to the deck of cards in front of her. “I have been aiding people in their journey for many years now, my lady. I have gained enough experience to need only the smallest components to do my job.” Sinister, malevolent, charming. “You could say that I am capable to do much more than any kind of impostor.”

She blinked and started to pull out her purse out of her pocket. She didn’t need to search for long – there was a number of pictures she kept in her belongings. Things that keep her sane in times when it felt like everything was for naught.

She unfolded the worn out picture, took a look at it and slid it across the table with a smile on her face. “Will that suffice?”

Both her daughters leaned over the table, trying to get a peek on the thing that she treasured the most. While Sayuri put her arms on the table, Mai tried to rattle her chair. The vibrations and sound set Akira on edge.

Did this girl really never learn how to behave herself?

“My, my,” he said before even taking the picture in his hand. With white gloved fingers, he took a hold of one of the greatest moments that was captured in her life with him. “When was this photograph taken?”

“During his graduation.”

A chuckle. “I see. Well then, I suppose I can congratulate you for your relationship, my Lady.” He slid it back to her and as soon as Akira could put her hand back on it again,  she felt how a dagger pierced the skin of her fingers  and the cold was brought to her heart. Freezing it in an instance, Akira lost all sense of time. 

Where was she?

What is happening?

Was was she doing?

Why was she here?

Why was she doing this?

Where is Goro?

Where is her husband?

Why is she so  _ incredibly fucking scared- _

“What a fitting couple you two are,” he said and pushed the deck towards her. Slowly, but surely, she could finally identify the shape of his eyes and the corners of his smirking mouth. “Please, go ahead, draw one.” He tilted his head, putting his elbows on the table and supporting his chin with his folded hands. “I assure you that the card will symbolize your husband’s desire without a doubt.”

Sayuri was looking at her. Mai instead was running around her side, rattling on her chair and pleading in the most pathetic voice she has ever heard: “Mommy, can I?”

Normally, Akira tried to teach her daughter things in the most gentle way. But Akira’s nerves were thin, easily snapping and ready to be a whip. And so, she simply said “No,” and drew the card.

The whines  of the younger girl right next to her were far away, didn’t even reach the shell of her ear. 

S he moved her fingers, the image of her husband popping up in her head. His gentle eyes, the soft brown hair, the finely cut face, his handsome appearance, his body that could still make her weak in the knees. His touch on her shoulders or temples, trying to ease the tension in her limbs. Their hands intertwined whenever they went for a walk, acting like they were freshly in love and hadn’t been married  over a decade already. 

His voice in her ear. Chuckling, being playful. The way he treated his daughters with the utmost care, cradling them like the most precious jewels in his world. How he hummed for Mai from time to time whenever she had rolled herself into a fetus and put her head on his lap, sleeping the rest of the wicked.

How he whispered into her ear whenever they were united. His groans and grunts, his harsh panting and the way his moans filled their bedroom deliciously. Sometimes, his words often turned her on more than their actual actions – be it his fingers inside of her, or his tongue-

Akira drew a card and was greeted with a black figure carrying a stick over their shoulder and some kind of animal following them. The number zero,  _ **0,** _ was a sight pierced into her mind. 

The man hummed and she could feel how he smirked. “This, my lady, is the fool.” The tips of his white gloves tapped against the black number on the bottom. Her focus was simply on this number, the corners of her eyes drenched in black. “The Fool represents innocence, divine inspiration, madness, freedom, spontaneity, inexperience, chaos and creativity. He is both the end or the beginning, the only card that doesn’t have a number. He is considered number zero or twenty-two.” A laugh. “I guess your husband must be very special then.”

Slowly, his face revealed itself to her. She could see round cheeks, a long nose stretching forward. A Pinocchio nose. “I’m assured you would agree, right?”

“ _How can such a worthless piece of trash be more special then me?!”_

A distant voice, unfamiliar to her, echoed through her ears. A strange man speaking to her, screaming at her, furiously and filled with rage. But something was unnerving her.

It sounded like her husband. It sounded like it was Goro speaking to her.

Akira rose from her seat abruptly. A surge of energy shot through her limbs, her senses heightened. Instead of black, she saw _everything._

His long nose. His large eyes. His white hair. The white gloves with the dark suit. The black cravat. It was a sight of familiarity.

But it wasn’t wistful nostalgic. It was _guilt._

“Hello, _**trickster**_ _.”_

The world around them blackened. Her daughters vanished, the tent disappeared and instead she could hear something from afar.

Something similar to chains. A drop of water. The uneasy creaking of metal.

“It’s certainly been some time, hasn’t it?” The fortune teller spoke, the veins in his eyes popping out. She felt all her insides clench. “And look how far you’ve come. A goddess among men. The closest being mankind calls a _child.”_

Akira took a step back.

His eyes lit up like fire.

_Hellfire._

“To think that something as simple as rescuing that fool would turn the real winner on my side.” And suddenly, the man, whose name suddenly began to get back into her head, stretched his hand toward her. “What did you say? _‘_ _You can’t always follow everyone else’s desire, right?’”_

T he way his voice suddenly sounded similar to hers, how a deep male voice suddenly changed to a female on,  her  _ **own** _ , let her clench her heart. Her soul was rebelling, pictures appearing in front of her eyes. But she couldn’t close them. Couldn’t squeeze them shut. Instead, her lids were kept wide open. They started to burn. 

“Humans are so amusing. In the end, my dear, you did just that. You were not capable to rebel against the higher beings. Instead, you destroyed this world and created it anew.”

His grin was the one of a predator. Ready to have her flesh between his teeth and blood flowing out of the corners of his mouth. “In the end, I win.” A chuckle. “I am glad to see you devoted yourself to your rehabilitation.”

Rehabilitation. A room in blue. Two girls, just in the age of her oldest daughters, flanking both sides. One soft spoken like Sayuri, the other aggressive like Mai.

“Please, princess.” The word sounded like an insult out of his mouth. “Please send my regards to your knight.”

Everything shattered like a mirror.

The world zoomed back in. The tent returned, everything was turning in circles and she could feel her limbs protesting. They were aching, weighing heavily. Confusion and panic dominated her thoughts.

“Mommy?”

She looked downwards, into the familiar face of her husband, replicated in her daughter. The only trait they shared was the black hair. The same color her husband has always proclaimed to love, whenever he pressed a kiss against her scalp or head. A hum would follow.

Akira’s finger twitched. “Mom, are you alright?”

Her other side, the one who looked so similar to her except for the color of her husband’s hair, gazed at her in worry. Silver eyes, her eyes, were filled with confusion and a mind too quick to be fooling herself. “You’re not looking good.”

Akira risked one last look on the fortune teller-

and was greeted by the sight of a young female with red lips like blood and beautiful hair. Not a man with a long nose. “Miss,” the woman spoke and it was a soft spoken tone, actually getting the exact same opposite as her reaction, “are you alright? Maybe you want to sit down-”

“We’re leaving!”

Without any declaration, she hoisted up her younger daughter into her arms, grabbing her elder’s wrist and dragged them outside. Protest and whines escaped both of them.

“Mommy-” Mai whined pathetically, pressed tight against her chest, “Why-”

“Mom!” Sayuri cried, tugging against her hold. She may be already strong enough to make her own choices, but they would never be strong enough against _her,_ her own mother. “What’s wrong with you? You’re hurting me-”

“We’re leaving this place.” There was no choice of resistance against her tone and for the sweet love of god, she would never tolerate it ever again. “We’re done here. We’re going home, right now-”

“ _Do you think this is the right choice, trickster?”_

Something slipped from her arms. Another whine, then huffing. Akira looked to the side, trying to find out where she heard the voice, the memory passing slowly.

“I don’t want to go!”

Her ears piqued up. Like in slow motion, she turned her head to the little girl standing in front of her. With both feet on the concrete beneath her, Mai had her hands balled into fist. Her black curls were swishing forcefully, the wind handling them like a whip, ready to punish anyone who dared to go against her wishes.

_There is nothing to stop you._

“ _The closest being mankind calls a child.”_

**My child.**

“This is my birthday! You promised me to go here!” The red eyes of her daughter, framed by her black curls, brought another picture into her mind. It didn’t rip her heart apart or even managed to touch it. It stayed icy cold in her chest, beating slowly and calmly. “You’re mad because Papa is not here!”

“Mai-”

_**Her red eyes**_ , _like the gloves she once wore,_ were filled with tears, _were drenching her hands,_ and her bottom lip _, the one he had kissed only once and never again,_ trembled, _like the heart that was beating when she received the possibility to save him._

“You only like Papa!” Her little feet stomped the concrete underneath her. “You don’t care about Sayuri! You don’t care about me! You only care about papa!” Her younger daughter lifted her face and she saw her red eyes glowing bright and snot running over her mouth.

Akira Akechi stayed still, looked at the girl in front of her and only one word escaped her lips.

“Who...”

The hard edge between her four year old daughter’s eyes deepened, a deep carve in the soft skin of a young girl. Utter betrayal and disgust. Sadness and fury. Disappointment and Hatred.

“I hate you!”

Milliseconds passed. Stars exploded. The moon melted and the sun shone bright. Cold in her stomach and head, heat in her fingers and legs, darkness inside her heart, light in her soul.

Akira blinked. The world shattered. A mirror cracked like the moon did when the sun came too close.

“Sayuri,” she spoke. She heard the girl’s hitch in her breathing. “When I’m not back in ten minutes, you need to find another family.”

With those words, she broke into a run.

From far away, the castle clock rang twice.

* * *

The girl ran off inside the crowd. No one was looking at her. And Akechi was happy with that. It was none of their business.

She arrived at the hall of mirrors. Akechi stayed still, looking forward. She heard the sniffles of the girl named Mai in the corners, echoing through the walls and creating a melody that was as lifeless as her dreams. They weren’t real.

The reason why she decided to pursue that girl was unknown.

“ _Mom, we want a cat!”_

Something cracked far away. Something fell on the ground.

“ _Don’t cry, Mama.”_

A chuckle echoed from the distance.

“ _I just had a nightmare and couldn’t sleep anymore.”_

The sound of chains rang from far away.

“ _There was a man in my dream… and I was in a prison.”_

Akira halted. The lights above her head shut down. A loud beep came from far away.

“ _We apologize for the disturbance. We will take care of the lights immediately. Please stay calm and do not panic,”_ a robotic voice spoke from the ceiling. _“If anyone wishes to complain about this power out charge, we advice you to turn to the chairman of this park. We will direct everything to him.”_ A snort. _“Like that would change something.”_

It was completely dark around her. Akira couldn’t see a thing. She listened to the girl’s sniffles.

She took a step forward. Something flashed in the corners of her eyes. A dot of red. Yellow. Light and dark blue. A slash of green. A flower of orange. A bloom of purple.

Her heart stopped beating. Everything was ending.

Akira Kurusu closed her eyes.

“ _Welcome Trickster.”_

Akira Akechi opened her eyes. A mother, a wife, who was on the search for her daughter.

Something fell shut right behind her. A squeak out of her lips.

The lady put a hand on her mouth. Her eyes widened.

Memories passed. A black hole was present in her head. She didn’t know why.

The only thing that was in front of her now…

was a blue room.


End file.
